?

Log in

No account? Create an account
my popsicle is dripping [entries|friends|calendar]
assqueen

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[20 Nov 2010|11:55am]
3 weeks
i still can`t believe I`ve been teaching in London for 3 months. Likely the hardest 3 months I`ve faced for a while. I`ve obviously had an easy life, but this journey has been emotional and terrifying and wonderful. For the first time, I actually feel ready to have my own classroom, but it`s been amazing to figure out what being a `teacher` means. I`ve been in all kinds of schools and met so many wonderful children, and I feel very, very lucky.

Though I don`t really want to let go of singing onstage again, or having the fun that comes with working in a restaurant, or the prestige of a better, higher paying job (because let`s face it, any idiot ca finish teacher`s college), I think I have just realized that what I`m meant to do right now, is to focus on doing this job well. I`ve also realized I`d really like to have a family of my own within the next 2-3 years. I believe I`m where I`m meant to be right now. I think it`s time to let go of my teenage life, which I have been holding onto so tightly.

Looking forward to seeing some friends and obviously Christopher this holiday.
Love love love you all.
3 comments|post comment

[29 Jun 2010|03:29pm]
restaurant jobs never get easier, and the money is never really worth the soul-sucking hours you will never get back.

why in the fuck did I do this again. I have a break down everyday at about 330.
post comment

[21 Dec 2009|10:42am]
merry christmas everyone

hope to see as many of you as possible for boozy coco and walks in the snow..
1 comment|post comment

[25 Nov 2009|01:32pm]
HI ya all.
Oh It has come down to me counting down the days again. When will I just be content to be in the moment and time that I am in, instead of constantly relying on the future to make things better? Christmas... Christmas, make it all better. It's ridiculous but it's all I can think of.

Teacher's College... how to describe it. Mostly b.s. I have maybe had one or two good moments this semester where I have actually felt inspired. It's pretty lonely here even though it's filled with people and kinda highschool-esq. I think what separates me from the others is that they all madly want to be teachers as soon as they possibly can and I'm just kinda wandering about in this program, not exactly sure what I want and what kind of role "teaching" will have in my life as a whole. I'm less concerned with things that they are in other words, but there is a lot of concern here and it is very contagious.

I love kids and that's pretty much all I know for sure. Beyond that, I don't know if I'll ever feel good enough to stand in front of them and tell them anything worth remembering.

London. OH London. I need to leave this place soon. I've out grown it I think, i'm over it. I think I'll be moving to B.C next fall and seeing what happens there. What kind of a life I can make for myself there with Chris. Not permanently of course, but for a long while.

I miss all my friends terribly, and sadly I spend a lot of my time thinking about the old days and longing to relive those amazing times, the smell of cigarillos and teenage freedom, the smell of chlorine clothes and the sound of bicycles. I realize you can't resent growing up forever, but I've been allowing myself this indulgence a lot lately.
1 comment|post comment

[07 Apr 2009|01:50pm]
so, iiii
GOT INTO ALTHOUSE! (westerns teacher's college)
i'm really happy, although, the thought of teachimg a year from now scares the hell outta me... i need more time to do nothing and just get really drunk. Plus i would make a horrible teacher right now. I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ANYTHING.
I'm probably just going to stay in school as long as possible, thats what I've decided.

On the other hand... I'm nowhere near done my undergrad...I still have to do an online course this summer to finish up my minor. andd oh yeah I have an essay due yesterday? Are things still due if they were technicslly already due? I'm running on no sleep and it kinda feels like im drunk.

Enough about me... I just wanted to send out an old fb hollar to my homegirls. I miss you all dearly and please excuse my lack of communication. I've turned into an Anika in that depo.. no offense to her, I love her dearly. but now i'm just as bad, and I just wanted to say sorry... and that hopefully this will all change this summer. I want to go on trips! to toronto, and other fun places.
Tell me more about yours summer plans people.. i need to know where eaxctly ya'll are going to be at and what exactly ya'll are going to be doing.
LOVE YOU
2 comments|post comment

[04 Mar 2009|01:53pm]
this is going to be emo.
I'm sad because i feel like ive lost at least five friends.. i don't know if ive done anything specifically, other than fallen through the cracks by not keeping in touch well enough, or not being important/interesting enough to be kept in touch with. both are understandable. it just sucks.
4 comments|post comment

[09 Oct 2008|01:20pm]
[ mood | curious ]

I really wish I could actually feel like I'm on top of all the work I have to do even just for a day, an hour even... No matter what it always seems as if I'm never caught up and what this does is makes me feel anxious at all times.

London is good. I've learned to hate it less and realize that I like it because it's comfortable and it suits my life right now.

What sucks is that I have no family this thanksgiving and I can't even go to Chris' family dinner because it's the only day I can go see my grandma. ahh well... Might be nice just to lounge around and eat pizza in my underwear.

Matthies is good. He's still got the reckless party boy gene in him, which I can tolerate only because it doesn't happen that often anymore... He still wants to be a pilot, which I would be more than happy about... and though it's sometimes hard to take boys seriously at all, I actually do think that he will make it happen somehow. We are both growing up in our own way.

I miss all my friends and hope that everyone is happy in their respective homes/lives/love affairs.

1 comment|post comment

[08 Sep 2008|12:23pm]
after a while, you just have to stop trying and trying and trying. I'm stopping the trying now.
5 comments|post comment

[11 Aug 2008|04:56pm]
Thins that have happened to me since my last post..... 1)I FINALLY PASSED MY G2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (...after three tries, but who's counting, right?) 2)I went to Montreal and got really jealous of all the people who lived there... it's just such an interesting place and so unlike London in every way. 3)I had a break down because I don't know what in the fuck I'm going to do after I graduate because I don't think that'll i'll ever be accepted to grad school.... at least not until I give bj's to all the music history profs.... I think I'll need to take a fifth year.... and then.....how the hell will I have the money. ...this is kife. also, camp is insane. helppppp....
1 comment|post comment

[31 Jul 2008|05:58pm]
I'm going to fail my French exam from 7 - 10 pm tonight... that's right, the whole time, i'll be failing. I haven't prepared at all. WHY in the heck do I always always do this to myself. I feel like puking. I think i have to pass the exam to pass the course or something absurd like that. faaaaccckkkk.

In other news... what are people's plans for the weekend. Is anyone doing anything wild? Also I have the entire week off this coming week, so calls me...... I'm really bored and my phone never rings. HANNAH ARE YOU ALIVE? i miss you all
post comment

[01 Jul 2008|07:47pm]
allo,
Everything is feeling all crazy these days... I feel like im offending someone no matter what I do even though I love all my friends big and the same. it sucks, but i suppose it's to be expected from stratford life.
Sadly, ish... I will be leaving for London soon to enter into six weeks of life altering hell. soooo, if anyone wants to excape to a seedy dance bar in london with me any night of the week... hollar at me. and don't forget about me... I'm only 45mins away.

Maybe ya'll can meet my insanely fat and spoiled nova scotia ex of sid crosbys non veg eating roomate. yaeah?

Oh yeah, and im going to fail my g2 tomorrow. ill let you all know if i pass... which i 99.67 percent wont.
1 comment|post comment

[18 Jun 2008|05:22pm]
It sucks when you are the only one that knows there is something wrong. I feel bad for her... but not really because she bring it all on herself.
7 comments|post comment

[22 Apr 2008|05:22pm]
I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BORED. keshia how did you do this all year? god please someone call me/talk to me. HAPPPPPPY BIRTHDAY HANNNNAAAAHHH I LOOOVE AND MISSS YOU SO MUCH ITS KILLING ME.

ALSO my back hurts, alot.
2 comments|post comment

[16 Jan 2008|08:35am]
it goes like this:
You go away for a week, and the school gets you back by raping you when you return to make you feel bad about having missed a week of school. looooorrd. get me out!
can it please just be friday, and can i please just have a really stiff drink in my hand, please?
1 comment|post comment

[26 Sep 2007|09:53am]
i just want everyone to know that it's keshia's bday soon. yay!
1 comment|post comment

[04 Aug 2007|03:40pm]
.... so got a drinking fine last night, just want everyone to know. 125$. im an idiot. ugh, never walk around with open alcohol, it just isn't worth it.
post comment

[24 Jul 2007|08:15am]
hi there.
i got steam heat, i got... steaaaam heat
but i can't get water, without your hand to hold.
4 comments|post comment

[20 Jul 2006|07:01pm]
Lj is dying.
3 comments|post comment

[02 Jun 2006|01:26am]
i love being emo...............................ajsalkjlajsaldjskakjsqowijhbfkjshkaj
1 comment|post comment

[25 Jan 2006|11:51pm]
Yupp booty calls.
6 comments|post comment

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]